Texas Bound...

Well here it is already, almost time to head back to Texas....where did the last month or so go? I can't remember. I think it is the coming off of winter break, trying to return to daily routines, trying to sleep, trying to meet deadlines for paperwork, planning trips, appt's here and there to get too, missing those we have lost and just trying to COPE with it all... so I guess I just busied myself with everything and now it is gone and I can no longer hide from this trip that I have to make. Don't get me wrong, it will be good to see all of my family and friends there, I just wish it was under different circumstances.

My mind is not focusing much, I am more than a bit preoccupied. I have a lot of things to figure out/decisions to make about what to do with Dad's estate and belongings. I feel it looming down on me. I haven't slept well in months. I am restless and scatter brained. Truth be told, I am scared... and sad... and worried...and I can no longer hide it.
I do not have to make these decisions all on my own, but somehow that fact is not helping me right now. I am just so lost...so heartbroken...so tired. I have a TON of anxiety about leaving the kids, which is just dumb because I have two of the best, most amazing and most capable women/angels looking after them while we are away. I find my mind wandering, drifting and constantly over-thinking everything. I am scared that I will make the wrong decisions, hurt people's feelings or have regrets later on when it comes to deciding what to do with everything.
I just HATE this...I really do.

Life right now feels a bit like a merry go round spinning all too fast.
I feel dizzy, off balance- life is all rushing by in a spinning blur.
I am in serious need of some grace right now...
life throws curve balls and I am trying my best to accept that and roll with the punches. It is definitely easier said than done- for sure.
We leave very early on Wednesday morning and will be back on March 7th. I have this huge fear of just losing it when I walk into Dad's house. I know it will smell like him, but I'll know that he never made it home and hasn't been there in a long while. I am truly just scared...scared that I will hurt more, which I just can't imagine right now.
Like I said...I am in serious need of some GRACE.
I am going to carry these pictures with me in hopes that they will help me be strong and remind me that Dad is always, always with me. I was only 2 days old in the top picture. He was such a gentle giant when I was little. The picture below was almost 11 years ago on my wedding day. We were both "full of nerves"...we were laughing at each other. I will never forget that day.

Please send positive thoughts/prayers our way for a safe trip.

I hope that none of you think I am complaining/whining...I am not. I simply feel better once I get difficult things "off my chest". I have a habit of keeping them bottled up.

Love to you all-

CHEER CAMP!

Lilly did a cheer camp at Barlow High School last week. She had a blast! The coolest part was she got to do it with her little cousin Catie Lynn and with her big cousin Sydney who was teaching some of the classes/cheers! Both girls had a blast and this is Sydney's last year doing it because she is a SENIOR!

They were all smiles the whole time (:

They all got to cheer at the last Varsity basketball game during half time. Great fun and memories for sure!

GO LILLY!

Sleepin' Hard...

We have all been crazy busy the last few weeks.
With all the busy, busy, go, go and the fact that Griff has started
fighting afternoon naps...

...it equals, passing out on the couch from time to time!

Poor Guy.
He never just passes out willingly.
I think it's a sign that we all need to slow down a little (:

Booth Sales

Aren't they CUTIE'S?
Most shoppers could not turn them down as they "solicited" for cookie sales.
We had both doors at Fred Meyer's on Friday night and it was a hoppin' place!
I had 4 girls at one door with me and Alyssa had 5 girls with her at the other.
We sold almost ALL the cookies we had!

Troop 45512 ROCKS!
Great job girls! We are very proud of you all!
Thank You to all of you that helped make our cookie season a success!

Painting

Griff has been enjoying painting lately...

He paints a little here, a little there and eats it too.
YUM!

She said Yes!

Our Valentine's Day was awesome!
We got to visit with John and meet Kelsey.
They are expecting a baby in September.
Such exciting news!

We went skiing at Ski Bowl.
They were both excited because they had never been night skiing.

Towards the end of the evening, John proposed to her at the top of the mountain.
It was very sweet and we feel very special to have been there. What a way to celebrate
Valentine's Day!

Congratulations Bubba and Kelsey.
We are so HAPPY for you both!
XOXO

For My Valentine:

This is a few days late...but better late than never.
Happy Valentine's Babe-
YOU ARE THE PEANUT TO MY BUTTER,
TWINKLE IN MY EYE,
SHAKE TO MY BAKE,
BLUE IN MY SKY,
SPRINKLES ON MY SUNDAE,
FLIP TO MY FLOP,
BUMBLE TO MY BEE,
JEWEL ON MY CROWN,
MILK TO MY SHAKE,
SPRING IN MY STEP,
BEAT OF MY HEART,
LOVE OF MY LIFE!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day to each of you.
May yours be sweet and full of LOVE.

Baking up some Love...

We made 50 of these yummy cupcakes today!
They are a combo of chocolate & strawberry.
It's a sign that LOVE DAY is just hours away!

I made both batters from scratch. The frosting is also a mix of chocolate and strawberry. The kids will pass them out at school tomorrow.
I know everyone will enjoy them because they are made with lots of LOVE (:

Cookies, Cookies & More Cookies!

Girl Scout Cookies are here! We picked them up today!
My garage is now jammed packed with over 1,000 boxes!!

A HUGE "THANKS" to all of you that supported Lilly and her Troop this year.
It's greatly appreciated by a very sweet group of girls that all have big ideas and dreams.
This money will go to a great cause, so give yourself a "pat on the back" for helping out!

Lilly and I will be in touch with those of you that placed orders soon to make arrangements for delivery. Payment is due upon delivery. For those of you that live far away, we will be shipping them to you shortly. Please send us your $$ owed. Checks can made out to Girls Scouts Troop 45512. *PLEASE, send $5.00 - $10.00 (depending on how many boxes ordered) for shipping costs and it needs to be separate from your cookie money total, so either just send cash or make a check out to me for the shipping.
For those of you that didn't get an order in, but are now just CRAVING these delicious cookies- No Worries...I got your back (:
Just call, text or e-mail me and I can get you some!
THANK YOU!

Much Better...

Mr. Griff is all recovered from his Dairy mishap and moving on!

YEAH (:

He has discovered Play-Doh and thinks it's just the coolest thing right now.
So glad he is feeling better.

Dairy is a No Go...

Poor Griff...

He is broke out in a bothersome rash, battling some gut problems and just not feeling great.

At least, I know the cause of it and he should be all better very quickly. It's all because of Dairy. Dairy, mostly milk, just does not agree with him. We learned this right after his first birthday when we attempted to make the switch from formula to milk. It didn't take long for his little body to let us know that regular milk was not going to cut it. No biggie- we made a quick switch to soy milk and he's been fine since. We were advised to attempt dairy milk/products around age two. So, we did and here we are again. He seemed to be tolerating it well for the most part. He had a slight rash, but we were expecting that to a point. He was on a 50/50 mix of soy and regular milk at that point. After almost 3 weeks of that, we progressed to full on dairy milk. The rash got worse and the poor guy's belly blew up like a balloon...he was miserable.

YIKES...
We are back to soy and will just keep it that way for a long while. I am not too concerned. Soy milk is very nutritious and hopefully he will out-grow his sensitivity to dairy just like Mac and Lilly did. I just feel bad for trying this and making him so uncomfortable!

Wednesday Picture

I never know these days how I am going to feel each morning when I wake up for a new day.

I try to make it a CHOICE to wake up with a smile and positive perspective. I guess the key word in that sentence is "try"...I do not always succeed, but at least I know that I put all my effort into it and that if I have a rough day...IT'S OK and IT WILL BE OK.

I awoke this morning with a sadness that cut deep into my heart and soul...it physically hurt. I immediately knew it was me missing my Dad. I wanted so bad to be able to pick up the phone and call him to fill him in on everything that we have been up too, how well all 3 of his grand-kids are doing and to share joy in the fact that he has another grand-baby on the way. I just simply wanted to hear his voice and tell him how much I love him. It's amazing to me how quickly someone that is so near and dear to us can be taken away in an instant. It's a lesson that I think we all learn in time. I am making progress with it each day. It's a hard one, but a necessary one.
I will get through today and hopefully wake up tomorrow with a smile.
Love to you all.

Majestic Monday

The mountain was calling out to me today.
This may sound odd to some of you, but not to me.
It was crystal clear out, calm and peaceful.
Mt. Hood is simply majestic.

How blessed are we to be surrounded by something so beautiful, magnificent, strong and glorious?
VERY BLESSED.
I think a lot of people forget it's right out their back door.
I hope this reminds you to stop and take it all in from time to time.
TRULY BREATH-TAKING...
Hope you all had a great Monday.

Family Birthdays & Super Bowl Sunday

All the family gathered on Sunday to watch the Super Bowl and celebrate a few birthdays. I love having everyone over to enjoy good times and create memories...it makes our house a home. I even remembered to put out the "Big Cake" on our front porch to wish the birthday people a happy one...as well as writing it on our chalk board in the kitchen.

Everyone was buzzing around, visiting and laughing.
Griff was eating...

...and eating some more!

Tarver, Mac & Alec cheering on their team.

Tarver and Lilly doing some cheering...

Sydney doing some cheering & lounging.
Happy 18th Birthday sweetie...can't believe you are 18!

Baby Brewer checking out the game...

Big smile from Papa.

CAKE TIME!

After we sang and blew out candles,
it was thoroughly enjoyed and devoured.

What a great Super Bowl Sunday and priceless family day...
even with a "cruddy" half-time show!
LOL...

Sunshine, Rainbows & Sweeeet Tricks!

It was a beautiful, sunny weekend!

We all hope that this is a dose of how our summer months will be.
It was just awesome.
We had a bit more "pep" in our steps and spent the days soaking
up the warmth and sunshine.
It didn't take long for the bikes to come out, a long with Mac's ramps.

Everyone was strutting their tricks...

...even Pat! (sorry for blurry picture)

Lilly and I took a time out to draw some chalk creations on the sidewalk (:

She is a great artist!

Yep- sunshine, rainbows, sweet tricks and smiles made it a wonderful weekend!